Letting Go to Live on Purpose After 50

You’ve probably been holding on longer than you should — to a belief, a relationship, a version of yourself that no longer fits. This episode of Design Your Life, Your Way is about what becomes possible the moment you finally let go and live on purpose after 50.

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I’m starting a brand-new series with this episode: a monthly deep dive into each pillar of my L.O.V.E. Method, the heart of the Life on Purpose Framework that I use in coaching. We’re starting at the very beginning: Let Go and Let God. This conversation is for the woman over 50 who has spent decades staying in situations that no longer serve you, or quietly carrying the belief that you’re not quite worthy of the life you want. I get real about letting go of the limiting beliefs I’d been carrying that prevented me from living my life in a way that serves my soul.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

  • Why letting go of the belief that you’re not worthy of happiness is the first and most powerful step toward designing your life your way
  • How people-pleasing keeps you from the life your soul is actually asking for, and how to start loosening that grip
  • What 17 years of meditation taught me about listening to my own inner wisdom and acting on it
  • The difference between feeling fear and being controlled by it, and why ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’ is more than a bumper sticker

Read the Transcript

You’ll also receive a live light language healing transmission — a multidimensional energy healing practice I use with my clients — designed to help you release whatever has been keeping you stuck. Come ready to breathe, reflect, and begin designing your life, your way.

Resources & links mentioned:

Design Your Life, Your Way – next steps:

TRANSCRIPT – Letting Go to Live on Purpose After 50

Gloria: Namaste. Have you ever considered what you need to let go of in order to design your life your way? Well, that’s what we’re going to talk about today. Specifically about. Yeah. Letting go and letting God. Because that is the. Let go and let God is the L in the love method that I wrote about in my best-selling book, Live Love Engage, how to stop doubting yourself and start being yourself. And it’s what I teach when I teach, when I, when I guest on other people’s podcasts. And it’s what I use in my elevate and empower coaching program for women over 50.

And I thought it would be a good idea, especially because I know on my old podcast Live Love Engage, we. I have talked about the love method a lot and I thought it was time to do it here because I know that the. We do have some new listeners. And thank you to all of you who have been downloading the podcast or, or watching us on YouTube or even on new reality TV as well. So I so appreciate all of you.

Embarking on a Journey of Self-Discovery

And I thought it was. I wanted to start doing periodically here and, and actually, frankly, I plan to do this like once, once a month over the next four months. We’re going to go through the first, the, the letters of love, because in the love method, love is an acronym. So. So like as I said today, we’re going to focus on letting go and letting God and how that really ties into designing your life your way.

And I want to share my experience because I know that this, this whole thing was given to me because I wasn’t living my life the way my soul wanted me to. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And I was, I was making some notes today. I was. One of the things that came up for me was among the things that I had to let go of. And I’m already starting to get teary-eyed thinking about this. And I was going to do some other things, but let’s just jump right into the meat of it here. Letting go of the idea that I wasn’t worthy to be happy.

Overcoming Limiting Beliefs and Rediscovering Worthiness

Golly. Okay, so I still clearly have to work on this, I think, because I think that is why this is making me so emotional. There’s still part of me that doesn’t quite believe that yet. Maybe. Or maybe it’s happy tears. Yeah. You know what? Let’s reframe this. Yeah, that’s happy tears. My soul is so happy that I am living life a lot more in line with what it has wanted for me for a very long time. There you go. Yeah. See See, and that’s. Thank you, God. Thank you, source, the universe, whatever you believe.

But for me, I. I still. I still come back to God. I was. I was raised Catholic. I’m not practicing anymore, but I still. Still believe in God. And because there is something I can’t. I, I. I don’t. I can’t not believe. I know I don’t like using double negatives, but I can’t not believe that there isn’t something out there. That is why we’re here. You know, frankly, so, so, yeah. So letting go of that, yeah, this. This I’m not worthy to be happy crapola, limiting belief is. Is. Is ridiculous. And if you are feeling any of that out there right now, I’m talking to you. I’m gonna get close to the microphone right here. Stop it. Just stop it. You are worthy no matter what situation you’re in in your life right now, no matter what challenges you may be facing.

Practical Steps to Redesign Your Life

And. And the whole idea of, like, sure, design my life my way. Yeah, easy for you to say, Gloria. I. I can’t do that right now because of xyz. You know what? Okay, you don’t have to design it your way today, but you could start planning it. And I talked about this a little bit in our last episode when I talked about, how do you know when it’s time to change? You know, how do you know when. When you hit that pivot point? So go back if you haven’t. If you haven’t watched that one or listened to it, go back and check it out.

But let’s focus still on letting go. So I think one of. One of the. One of the main sticking points in why I settled for so long in and how my life was looking. And I would say especially after my wonderful two amazing kids, my. My son and daughter, after they moved out of the house, because when they were still living there, you know, I. I really had a. A purpose of, you know, being a mom. And, you know, and I’m still their mom. And. And. And they still do come for me to advice for advice occasionally, thank goodness. I. You know, but they are. They’re Both in their 30s now, and, you know, l. And doing a darn good job of it, I must say. So I must have done something right as a mom. That’s what my sister used to say anyway. She’s like, Gloria, yes, you’re doing better than our mom. So don’t. Don’t give yourself such a hard time. And I so appreciate that, Michaela. See, I can still hear you saying that even though you’re not here physically in the world to tell me that anymore.

Breaking Free from Family Patterns and Expectations

But where was I? Oh yeah, okay. So, yeah, so I was settling in my marriage, especially after the kids moved out and they were, you know, well on their way of living their own lives. And, and I think one of the main reasons was that I had this belief and, and, more often [than not], intention when I did get, when I did finally get married was that I wanted to be the one person in my family who was going to stay married, gosh darn it, because my parents had gotten divorced.

Their divorce, actually I was checking on this today was what I suspected. After 40 years of marriage, they finally had their divorce become official. They were separated before that. My, my brother, he, he got married once and then got his marriage annulled, whatever. And then my sister, well, got married twice and got divorced twice. So. So there wasn’t this really great track record of successful marriages in, in my family, even though I knew other people who in my life who, who did manage to stay married till death do you part type of thing. So I was determined I was going to be that one, you know, I was going to be the sibling, you know, to. And so I really, I think that’s why I was. Even though I wasn’t happy about certain things in my marriage, I put up with them because okay, sure, I was raised this good cathing girl even though again, I didn’t have the best cath like role models but my in laws were good, they were practicing Catholics and they stayed married until my mother in law passed.

The Power of Mindfulness, Meditation, and Nature

So I did have that and I, and as I said, I had another good friends of my family, godparents of my kids and they also stayed married for well over 30 years, I think. So yeah, so I wasn’t, it took letting go of that idea and yeah, let’s jump right into letting God in. I’m going to go back to some other things too, but I want to jump into this. I think what a couple of the things that gave me the ability, gave me the ability to let go of that notion was that I had started a meditation practice back in 2009 and it has evolved over the years. I’ve done lots of different types of meditation and yet I still meditate to this day.

And it’s, it’s, you know, getting almost going to be 30, almost going to be 20 years. Sorry, my math is bad. So, so 17 years, I guess. Yes, 17 years of meditating now I can officially say and that this is why I recommend meditation so much when I, I talk about it constantly, I think, on this podcast and, and with other guests we’ve had on the show and also with my own clients that. Doing some form. Doing some form of my mindfulness practice. Oh, my gosh, it’s so helpful to get to know yourself. And there’s other things, too. You know, journaling. I’ve done journaling off and on, I think, all of that time as well. But there’s something about getting quiet, really getting still and being able to listen to that, being able to hear, really hear that quiet voice inside of you that is your soul talking to you. So that’s where. Yeah, I think that’s. That’s what started. Well, of course, also starting to really delve into writing this book. Writing my book about the love method really did help me as well, because one of the things I did, one of the ways I was writing it, how I initially wrote the. The first draft of it, is I would go to the beach every week on a Friday morning when it wasn’t as. Wasn’t as crowded, you know, because weekends are always popular for the beach. So I would go on Friday morning and I would spend time writing in my book. But sometimes I would just spend time walking, walking along the beach and, and just listening to the waves and then listening to what my heart was trying to tell me.

Because all of my life, even, you know, even though, again, I said I was. I was raised in the Catholic Church, would go to church every week, but really the ways that I felt close to God was when I was out in nature, whether it was when I was a kid and I would go to Girl Scout camp in the, in the woods of Michigan and, you know, walk, walk in the woods or go, you know, be out in a canoe on the lake. And then as I said, and then when I got older, and especially after I moved to Florida and was able to be able to go to the beach much more regularly, That is what had. I really do. It absolutely has helped me to be able to say, okay, what. What about your life is not. Is working? You know, what can we keep? What can we get rid of? You know, what. What changes do we need to make?

Reclaiming Your Needs from People-Pleasing

So I’ll come back to that in a minute because there’s some. Another part of that I’m going to share in a second. The other thing I needed to let go of. And, and, and again, this was for me, and whether this resonates with you or not, you know, consider it was letting go of the idea that I had to Put other people’s needs first before my own. And yeah, I, One of my default strategies that I learned as a kid was to be a people pleaser and to make sure that other people were happy.

You know, I did, I would make myself happy too, but I really wanted to make sure before I could do. What I wanted to do was that other people were okay and that they were taken care of. And now there are some instances where that is really important. You know, when I became a mom and I had young kids, I did have to put their needs ahead of my own a lot of the time. And then when my sister was going through her cancer journey, I willingly, you know, flew across the country to be with her as often as I could to take, help take care of her, because she was my big sister. You know, she took care of me when I was, when I was a little squirt, you know, she babysat me. And I know, I’m sure as a, you know, 11 year old and 12 year old, she didn’t want to have to do that. And then certainly when she got older, as a teenager, have her little sister tagging along. I, I know there’s a, there’s a picture of me at my, one of my sister’s pajama parties.

But after she passed and as I said, you know, my kids were living their own life. It’s like, okay, well, let me take a hard look and see is my life. Am I happy in my life? Has it turned out the way I wanted it to be? And there were a lot of things that were still great. You know, I had started my business and I loved being, being in business. I’d made some new friends along the way in the business and, you know, and I was exploring different ways of, of expressing spirituality. But there was this big neon sign that was staring me in the face that I kept trying to ignore where I had Been doing a lot of growing as a person, and the wonderful man that I married all those years ago wasn’t quite keeping up, God bless him, you know, and we’re. He’s still texting me this morning, you know, telling me about back at our house, that one of the. One of the bushes is dying, so he’s going to do some trimming of it, and, you know, and that’s fine. And we found a way to communicate that. Still, at times, sometimes I do need to set some better boundaries. But, you know, hey, nobody’s perfect. I don’t claim to be perfect. I’m always a work in progress, and I’m always striving to get better because, you know, as they say, if you’re not growing, you’re dying. And I don’t intend to die anytime soon. I got a lot of living to do.

Letting Go of Fear and Embracing Change

Okay, so let’s see, what else. What do I have in my notes here? What else did I have to let go of? Well, I think those are. Those are. Those are some biggies right there. And that’s what I invite you to do. If you are looking to design your life, your way is to start thinking about that. What. And it might be something like that where you make a. Make a list and, you know, list all the things in your life that you’re quite satisfied with, that you’re happy with. Then maybe list some things where there could be room for improvement. And then start looking at things, looking at those aspects of your life, the areas of your life perhaps where things aren’t quite the way you’d like them to be. And. And ask yourself, am I settling? Have I been settling for less than what I want? Because I’m trying to keep the peace or it’s too scary. There’s another thing. Yeah. Oh, that’s what I didn’t talk about. That’s a good one to talk about. Let’s talk about that. Letting go of fear oh, yeah, baby oh, yeah, yeah, yeah My heart is going yes, yes, yes.

My soul is like, yes, you need to talk about this. Letting go of fear. Because humans are so interesting. We crave variety, and we crave stability. How do we make that work? How do we embrace change while also embrace keeping things the same, you know, or, you know, being comfortable? Because change often does require us to step out of our comfort zone. And being in our comfort zone is nice. It’s comfortable. You know, it’s why we don’t make change. Because we’re like, okay, you know, yeah, life is good. Life is fine. I. I can. I can be here and. And. And chill for a while, but at some point, we can start to be bored with that, and we start saying, like, oh, we need to shake things up. And here’s just a really simple example of that, and I know my sister was the same way, is that I like to rearrange furniture sometimes in my apartment. And I used to do this even as a kid in my bedroom. I would change around the configuration of my bedroom because that was one area I could control in my house.

Because we. Like I said, I think we. We are creatures of habit, and yet we also like variety. And the only way to get variety in our life is to change something. So it’s like this weird dichotomy of, like, oh, I don’t like to change, but I really want to change.

And so we, you know, it’s like, you know, you get the. The devil and the angel kind of fighting against each other. And there comes a point, and this was what I talked about last week, that pivot point where you finally reach a point where you’re like, okay, that’s it. I’m ready. I’m gonna make the change.
I’m gonna do something different. So. But in order to do that, you do have to let go. You gotta let go of the fear. You gotta let go of that fear. And just what is it? False evidence. Appearing Real is the acronym someone some enlightened person came up with.

So maybe it’s. It’s. It’s letting go of the. Oh, thank you. Letting go of the attachment to fear. Because that’s different, because fear keeps us safe. Sometimes it works a little too hard at keeping us safe. So it’s you still, when you take that courageous step to try something new, you’re gonna fear. You’re gonna be fearful as you do it. There’s no. Because otherwise you wouldn’t bother doing it.

Right? So the fear is gonna be there, but so what you have to loosen, let go of is the. The attachment to that fear and just kind of say, okay, yes, I feel the fear and I’m doing it anyway. Yeah, feel the fear and do it anyway. Oh, that felt good. Yeah. Because when you do guess what happens if it really was something that you. Your soul was really wanting for you, it’s going to feel so good once you’ve done it. And you can be like, oh, why was I so afraid? And then you can laugh about it and that’s okay. We need a little laughter in our lives, you know?

Letting God In: Communication and Faith

And that’s a biggie. I can’t believe I didn’t even have that in my notes. That is so funny because that. I think that’s the biggest one to let go of. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so let’s talk about now letting go, but now letting God. We talked about this a little bit earlier. Oh, I saw an acronym once. I don’t know if I still have it written down here. Somebody. Yeah, I. I read something somewhere where, Where God stood for something, and I don’t have it now. Doggone it. Yeah, it was. I wonder if I could think. Maybe I could just think of one. What. What could. What could God stand for as an acronym? Getting own desire. Going. I don’t know. I can’t think of it. All right, whatever. We’re not going to worry about it anyway.

Letting God. Letting God. Letting source. Letting your higher self in. Whatever it is for you. For me, what helped me to design my life my way was, as I mentioned before, meditating for sure. Journaling, getting to know. Getting to know myself, but. And really getting to listen to it and hear it and act on it. Yeah. And acting on it. And that was how I was able to design my life my way. And one of the other things that I did and was something that a gift was given to me was this ability to communicate in a way that bypasses my. My logical brain. It’s a way of communicating that speaks directly to my heart and my soul. And it’s something that. It’s called light language. And it’s. It’s not as popular as modalities like Reiki, but I think it’s. It’s getting to be more visible, more. I wouldn’t say mainstream yet. It’s still probably what a lot of people would call woo. Woo. And I’m okay with that. I’ve. I’ve embraced the woo side of me.

Using Light Language for Transformation

It’s. It’s. It’s perfectly fine. It’s. It’s interesting and different and, and unique and a way for me to express my. It’s a way for me to express myself in A way that I didn’t know I could. And yet as I have come to understand it, it really is a way that we all were able to communicate before we came into these human bodies. So it’s why I think to a lot of people when they do hear light language, it sounds familiar even though they may not again be able to translate it word for word. Sometimes you might be able to translate the emotions and the feelings that come through as opposed to a literal word for word translation, you know, like you can do if you hear, if you hear French. I, I, I love watching on Netflix.

There’s this real estate show, these high end family of realtors in Paris and I forget the name of the show if I find it, I’ll put it in the show notes and you can check it out. But I’ve been, I’ve been watching the show now for about maybe six years now. I think they’re on their sixth season or something like that. And so I don’t speak French. I know a few words here and there from like when I was a kid and I, I’ve learned a little bit of it but so I’ll put the English, you know, subtitles up there but I don’t have to because I, I have that ability.
But like I said, light language is something that, it’s a, it’s a multidimensional communication form of communication that again, it’s something that speaks to, can speak to your heart, can speak to your soul.

And what I found for me was that it really was able to help me to let go of some of these limiting beliefs that I, we talked about earlier today where I talked about, you know, having that people pleasing tendency or you know, this belief that I’m not worthy. Light language helped me to, really has helped me and continues to help me as I continue to practice it. It continues to help me to that and that’s why I love sharing it with, with clients, I love sharing it with other people.

[Audio transmission only]

Closing Thoughts: Living Boldly and On Purpose

Oh goodness. I, I, I hope that helps you to release whatever has been keeping you stuck possibly or just, you know, allows you to think a little clearer maybe in answering those questions I talked about earlier. So, and you can always go back in and listen to this again too if you want to. Just go back in to the end and listen to that a couple of times. And if you go to my YouTube channel, you will also find that I do have some light language, other light language videos on there where I have shared, shared specific messages.

Some, some that were taken from my past podcasts and some that were just recorded, recorded straight for, for YouTube. So go to Gloria Grace Rand on YouTube and you’ll be able to find those there. So I think, I think that’s gonna do it for today. I really hope that you are letting go. If you have any people pleasing tendencies, let them go a little bit.
Oh, let them go. Just let them go. Let it go, Let it go. I’m, I’m gonna, I’m gonna singing mood today. What can I say? Let it go. Let go. Whatever is. Let go of the idea that you’re not worthy to be happy. Yeah, that’s, let’s go back to that one and start thinking of how you want, how do you want your life to look if it’s not, if it’s there and it’s great. Hey, wonderful. Share this podcast with someone who maybe might need some help in that. In that area.

And if you do have some areas where things are not quite the way you’d like them to be, then, you know, it’s never too late. You can always start over. I mean, hey, I was. Let’s see, I was 59 when I’ve decided to do this, to do. To move out and to ask for a divorce, I think. Or I was in my late 50s. Okay, so you never. It’s never too late.
I just. I just hope that you know that you. You deserve all the love and happiness and joy in your life because you are an amazing human being. I may not know you personally, but I’m grateful to you for listening. If you listen this far, if you watched this far, I’m so grateful for you. And I just. Yeah, I’m. I’m just really grateful. So thank you. Thank you for being with me today. I hope my words have inspired you to go out today and live boldly and on purpose.

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