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The True Meaning of Love with Kim Sorrelle

In this episode, (recorded live on Facebook), we are joined by Kim Sorrelle, the executive director of a non-profit, speaker, entrepreneur and author of the new book, “Love Is” which details her year-long quest to learn the true meaning of love.

On this episode of the Live. Love. Engage. Podcast:

  • Why Kim embarked on this year-long quest to understand love
  • What she discovered about herself in the process
  • What she hopes her book will accomplish
  • What Kim wishes she’d known before visiting Haiti
  • What roles forgiveness and gratitude play in understanding love
  • How Kim coped with the loss of her husband to cancer

Connect with Kim
Website: kimsorrelle.com

TRANSCRIPT

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Live. Love. Engage. Podcast: Inspiration | Spiritual Awakening | Happiness | Success | Life

TRANSCRIPT

Gloria Grace Rand
Namaste, and welcome to a live version of Live Love Engage. We’re recording live on Facebook today. And I am delighted to be with you. And I’m also going to invite our guest with us on the show right now. Her name is Kim Sorrelle. So welcome to Live Love Engage, Kim,

Kim Sorrelle
thank you so much. So happy to be here.

Gloria Grace Rand
I’m delighted to have you here. And let me let me tell our viewers on Facebook as well as our listeners who will be listening, who are listening on all the wonderful podcast platforms all about you and why I’ve got you on the show today. So Kim is entrepreneur. She is a director of a humanitarian organization, speaker, writer and author of actually two books, she has written a book called cry until you laugh, and which is about her journey through the cancer jungle and her newest book, which is available for pre order the paperback version anyway and well on the Kindle version too on Amazon right now is called Love is and it’s a year long experiment to discover the true meaning of love. Which is precisely why I wanted to have you on the show today to be able to talk about that. So let’s let’s start off with you giving our viewers and listeners here, some insight into what was it that prompted you to go on to this year long journey. And then and then we’ll talk about also then why you wanted to write the book later. So we’ll get we’ll get into that. But first off just what prompted this journey.

Kim Sorrelle
Yeah, it was kind of interesting. I was diagnosed with breast cancer, which is a shocking thing. Nobody ever wants to hear those words come out of anybody’s mouth. And so it was tough. And I was going through it. And four months later, my husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. And then he passed away six weeks later.

Gloria Grace Rand
Oh my gosh,

Kim Sorrelle
yeah. And so um, and I loved that man. We had a great marriage. He was amazing, amazing guy. And after losing him, it really made me question love. You know, what is? What is love? Really? What’s the true meaning?

Gloria Grace Rand
Hmm. So what did you do then? How did this What did this journey look like? I guess is when you say you went on a year long journey? Did you go somewhere? Or did you just start talking to people? What did that look like?

Kim Sorrelle
Yeah, well, I I ended up wondering what I was going to do after losing my husband and getting through all my cancer stuff. And I decided to help out this organization as being a part time bookkeeper for them starting on January 1 2010. And 12 days later, there was an earthquake in Haiti that killed 200,000 people. So two weeks after that I was in Haiti, and then I spent most of the next seven years there. And so that’s where I did most of my research and writing.

Gloria Grace Rand
Oh, wow. I can I can’t even really imagine how how, what that circumstance would have been like, tell us a little bit about I mean, what was it about that experience that really touched your heart and, and helped you to learn about love?

Kim Sorrelle
You know, love is universal, right? And you can have all these preconceived notions about other people in other places, and we like to use the word they and we like to use the word… call people by titles and and group people together. When really we’re all individuals. And we’re people are people all over the world. And so even though people live differently in different places, we’re all the same. We’re all on the same level, and we can all relate to each other. And I just learned a lot about really, humanity and understanding that understanding that we’re all the same.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah. So I mean, if someone sees this title when they see, you know, love is normally or a lot of times we’re, we’re thinking about love, but oh, okay, there we go. You froze there for a second. But it sounds like you’re talking more about a bigger definition of love really, like more about love for? I guess brotherly love, in a sense, although I don’t like that patriarchal way of saying it. Can we say? I don’t know, humanity, love human human love, I suppose, as opposed to like relationship. Is that? Does that accurate? In describing it?

Kim Sorrelle
Yeah, for sure. For sure. I mean, certainly the things that I discovered, would help with intimate relationships, but also helps with the people that you work with, and the people you meet on the street or at the grocery store. So it is it’s a it’s a love for everybody. So human love. I love that term. That’s a great way to describe it.

Gloria Grace Rand
So can you give us an example about you know, one specific lesson possibly that you learned? And maybe something that you tell in the book?

Kim Sorrelle
Yeah, sure. So I took this 2000 year old poem that you hear at a lot of weddings, love is patient love is kind does not envy does not boast, etc. And I took it one word at a time to figure out what what is love that is patient, what is love that is kind, you know, doesn’t envy. And so, I learned that all those words, when you put them with love, changes the whole meaning. It’s not how Noah Webster described, it changes the whole meaning of the word. So like, for instance, love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. I thought, I thought I knew what that was, it seems pretty easy. You know, you don’t hold a grudge or whatever. And bitterness only hurts you anyway. But when I was working on that chapter, I happened to go with this group of men, eight men from Missouri, to Haiti, they wanted to work out a water project that that I was working on that I was heading up. And I brought two of my Haitian friends with me to translate, also men. And we got there to where we were going to stay out in the countryside. And it was typical Haitian with the walls around the building. And, and the small building had two rooms, and there were four twin beds in each room. So there’s eight men from Missouri, two men from Haiti and me. And so the the head guy from Missouri pulled me aside, Kim, can I talk to you? Can I talk to you? So sure, you know, he said, Did you see the rooms? And I said, Well, there’s not much else to see. I’m thinking and then I thought, Oh, he’s gonna think I want my own room. And, and so I’m gonna say, oh, gosh, I don’t care if other people are sleeping in my room. And he’ll go Oh, good, because, you know, we we only have so many beds and and I well, and so I said, Oh, gotcha. I’ll just sleep outside. And he went, Oh, good, good, good. And so I thought, well, goodness, so I had to sleep outside. I found a piece of plywood to put over sort of these Haitian workhorses, and I slept underneath it on an air mattress that held air for about an hour a night. And the dogs barking and the horns honking and all the things that happened and my biggest fear was something landing on me crawling on me, right? There’s snakes, whatever. And two different nights. So five nights of this, and two different nights I woke up to because something was on me. Slowly lifted my head slowly opened my eyes. And both times it was the same thing. Both times it was a chicken. A chicken woke me up! And, at first, I was angry, stupid chicken. But then I thought praise the Lord. It’s not a snake or you know, a tarantula. chupacabra or something. So anyway. So love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. So, you know, at first I was like, kind of bitter toward this guy. You know, I think and I hope my sons wouldn’t have ever behaved that way you know to make go outside But then I realized love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. What that means is the bitterness goes away the story, I’ll always remember the story. But the narrative changes. It goes from this angry, gosh, what is this man doing to me to just this funny story that I lived through? And so it’s a change of heart and change of attitude, and I have no bitterness or ill will.

Gloria Grace Rand
That’s right. And then now you’ve got an interesting story to tell and to let other people make up their own minds about, you know, how you react or how are they can think about how they might react in a similar situation. So that’s wild. Yeah, it? Yeah, that was That was shocking. So So tell me, what led you then to decide after you’ve been you know, where you were on this year long journey, what made you decide to actually write about it?

Kim Sorrelle
It was so enlightening, and so life changing and transformational to me that I wanted to share it with the world. I mean, I want to share it, I think it’s life changing would be life changing for anybody. And the overall biggest thing that I discovered about love is that it is complete freedom. It’s total freedom, like it releases you from being envious from being bitter from holding a grudge, like we talked about already, or from being impatient, or, you know, whatever you’re going to be or judgmental, like, it releases you from all of that. And it just lets people be who they are. It lets you be who you are, which then is just complete and total freedom. And all you have to do is love.

Gloria Grace Rand
Wow. Well, that’s a really good way to be. And hopefully we can, we can emulate that. What other than the story about, you know, having to sleep outside? What was the biggest challenge you’ve had to face while you’re during this year long journey?

Kim Sorrelle
Well, Haiti is a difficult place to be. And I’ve worked in a lot of countries around the world, and Haiti is the toughest. And it’s hard. I mean, the average Haitian eats three meals a week, I mean, people live on less than $1 a day. It’s the most impoverished country in the Western Hemisphere. It’s a tough place to live, it’s a tough place to work, it’s a tough place to be. And so there’s obstacles there that you don’t run into here. You got to worry about the water, you know, you’re not going to just drink any water, you got to make sure it’s the right water coming out of the right filters. And and, you know, and where are you going to sleep? And what are you going to eat that isn’t going to make you ill, and if you’re going to eat, and there’s just so many challenges, the roads are challenging, the infrastructure is challenging, the government’s challenging. Everything about it is challenging. I thought, Man, if I can find love here, like I can figure love out here. I could figure love out anywhere,

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah. Now, did you find that that the experience then helped you in you know, handling, I don’t know if handling is the right word but but the you know, grieving the loss of your husband, you know, that’s I can only imagine how difficult that could have been, especially because you were talking a little bit beforehand. And he and in reading about you, it sounds like he was a you know, amazing man, you had a really deep and abiding love for one another. So how did you navigate? There’s a good word, how did you navigate the grief process?

Kim Sorrelle
I really think being in Haiti helped. I really think I’m giving of myself, even though I got so much more out of every day than I could ever give. But I’m working to help others putting my focus on other people and away from myself. I think that that made a big difference. And my husband was a great guy. He was awesome. I met him when I was 17 years old and fell madly in love as soon as I met him and I 10 days after I met him, I asked him to marry me and he said yes. So we got married young and grew up together and had a great relationship and I, I believe in an afterlife. And so I know how faithful and wonderful My husband was and So I know he’s in a better place. And I can’t begrudge that, because he did it right. He did life right. He was kind and gentle and caring, and had a huge heart and taught me a lot about love. Before I even went on this journey.

Gloria Grace Rand
well, that’s good. Do you ever feel that you’re going to be able to find another love like that? In the future? Do you think it’s in the cards for you?

Kim Sorrelle
Well, the pool’s pretty shallow, I would say. The older I get the shallower it seems to get, I guess. I think, you know, most of the good men are taken. And then ones that aren’t married, maybe shouldn’t. So, you know, I’ve dated a little it’s been crazy. I’m horrible at it. That should be a book. Someone should teach me how to do. Right. So yeah, I don’t know. I don’t know. I, I think you know, it’s so important to be happy alone before you can be happy with somebody else. And be healthy alone, right? Yeah. So so I’m certainly there. So if somebody is, so if you know, anybody, feel free to introduce me, I guess?

Gloria Grace Rand
Well, if not, I’ve at least had I think I’ve had some relationship coaches on on the show before. So maybe I’ll point you in that direction at least.

Kim Sorrelle
There you go.

Gloria Grace Rand
What, what do you wish you had known When you started out on the process of you know, before you went to Haiti before you started this, this journey? Is there anything?

Kim Sorrelle
Yes, I feel like I was a slow learner. Because I didn’t know enough. You know, it’s not like you go to the store, and there’s a Love for Dummies, right? Or how to love or a manual on it. You learn how to love from your parents, from your grandparents, from other people in your life, you know, you just kind of learn and not everything you learn is right. And not everything you learned about love is good. And so and I not that I didn’t have love. But I did not understand real love, or a lot of things about love. And if I would have gone into it alone, more equipped, a little more knowledgeable about it, it would have been an easier journey, I think, then what it ended up being

Gloria Grace Rand
Can you give an example of you know, what, specifically that you didn’t know about Love that you that you wound up learning?

Kim Sorrelle
Yeah, well, love doesn’t easily anger. Right? It’s one of the things that it says, well, we all get angry, right? I mean, we all get mad, mad at stuff. And I had the situation where this, I found out that a guy that I was paying full time to work for me was working a lot of weeks for somebody else, and not getting paid by that person. But the guy that worked for me has such a huge heart that if somebody says can you help you with this? He says yes. So I’m paying him to work full time thinking he’s working full time. He’s not. So I ended up meeting with a guy who was American, and should know better in business, I believe. And so I ended up meeting with him and, and I was angry, but I was trying to keep my goal. But I was mad. And, and he said some things that made me even angrier. Like that I didn’t understand I’m an entrepreneur, I’ve been in business for years and years. And he acted like I didn’t understand how business works, how things work than he said, Oh, just you got to read this book, you know, just, you just have to read this book. And, and it’ll tell you, you know, more and I’m thinking I probably read more business books than this man has ever seen in this lifetime, right? And then and then I said, and then I figured out you know, I’m just gonna get angrier, and that this is really between me and the guy that that I work with, and really has nothing to do with this guy. And so I said, You know what, it’s fine. It’s fine. Before I blew my top. I said it’s fine. I’ll deal with this. And he goes, Oh, it’s fine. It’s fine. You sound like my wife when we were having an argument and she says it’s fine. Oh, buddy. Holy cow. I don’t know I feel sorry for your wife right now, frankly. But anyway. I I got angrier than I should have and handled things not the way I should have. I never should have even talked to this guy like it was between me and my staff member Right. And, and so I realize that in loving you, you don’t just blow your top, that you keep your cool that if you really love the person you’re with, and I believe you’re supposed to love everybody. And so that guy who was, you know, maybe a little patronizing, right. I love him. I need to love him. I think at that moment, I didn’t necessarily love him. But I love him now. And I, but had I gone in with an attitude of love, it would have been a whole different story.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah, absolutely. One thing we haven’t talked about, and I know, in my journey of love and learning about love, that forgiveness plays a role in this, what have you found related to that?

Kim Sorrelle
Yeah, forgiveness is huge. You know, unforgiveness, the opposite side of that only hurts you, right? Like, um, you might end a relationship, you might unfriend somebody on Facebook, you know, whatever it is, but they’re not really hurt by it. They’re not thinking about it all the time. But forgiveness, festers, you know, it like finds a place in your heart, and it just wreaks havoc in your life. And, and so, if you love really love, it’s not even about forgiving. It’s about okay, so they made a choice to do something that I didn’t agree with, that I didn’t necessarily like. But that’s totally on them. That’s their choice. And it doesn’t have anything to do with me. And so it doesn’t even have to get to a point of forgiving or not forgiving, but more just realizing I love that person. I don’t agree with what they said or their choice, but I’m not gonna hold it against them.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah, that’s important. Because that, because you’re right, it’s when we are holding a grudge against someone or whether we choose to forgive or not. It’s really all about us, because they’ve done their thing. They, they could care less, probably they, whether they know that we were hurt by whatever they said or did anyway, it doesn’t really matter. Either they understand or they don’t, it’s still up to us to make that decision to choose how we want to be. And going forward. So yeah. What of what about? Have you found that gratitude plays a role in love? Have you discovered that at all?

Kim Sorrelle
Oh, 100% 100%. I mean, gratitude, I think changes your life. Right? Just expressing gratitude just every day being grateful, and being grateful for something and someone and, and acknowledging that is so important. And that’s showing love really, yeah. It’s a it’s love, on a great level, where you love somebody deeply enough that you are grateful for them. And it doesn’t have to be a partner, or a best friend. I mean, shoot, I’m grateful for the guy that delivers my groceries. Right? I mean, you know, there’s so many things to be grateful for, and there’s so many people to be grateful to. I mean, we, there are so many lives that touch our life every single day. And, and if we sat down and wrote them down on paper, it would probably blow our minds, because there’s so many, right. And I’m grateful for all of them. And it does change your attitude for sure. And I think it expands what you’re able to give when when you’re grateful.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah, absolutely. I 100% agree with that. For sure. Um, what impact would you like to have on planet Earth, you know, during the rest of your lifetime that you’re here? And I know a lot of people talk about legacy, but I but I think really just what kind of impact do you want to be able to have?

Kim Sorrelle
Well, I believe really strongly in this message. Like, I think that it’s love that we need, especially right now always we need it but especially right now, I mean, you know, but there’s political wars going on. There’s people separating from each other for vaccinations or no vaccinations. I mean, silly stuff, right that when you say step back and look at it. We’re all people, people are people all over the world, and we can have our own opinions. And we can believe what we want to believe. And that should not take away from how much you love somebody, you’re not loving somebody for their opinion. Or, or then it’s conditional, right? Then you’re loving them. Because you want them to fit in some box, you you know, they need to do something to earn your love, love shouldn’t be earned. Love is a gift that you just give, and, and a gift you receive. And without condition.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah. And in fact, frankly, I think the the more you are able to give love that helps you to be able to then receive that much more love, in return. So it really does, it’s a wonderful circle. And we can keep showing other people that we do care about them. And that we do recognize that they are people just like us, I have, you know, the same types of bones and muscles and blood cells underneath the skin, even if the skin color may be different, that we are still human beings. And we do have that in common. And we do need to be able to respect one another. What is What are you curious about right now? As we especially as we head into… You know, I realized we were talking about gratitude before I didn’t mention that, you know, we’ve got Thanksgiving coming up next week. But put that aside for the moment. But yeah, what is there anything that you’re curious about right now, as you’re getting ready to officially launch your book?

Kim Sorrelle
yeah, you know, I’m curious. I there, there are things I’m curious about, I’m curious about the future. I’m curious about what what are we turning into? And, and what should we be turning into? You know, I’m curious what it’s going to take for people to get back to the basics of life, and get away from the politics and get away from the discord and get away from the boundaries that were the ones that put them on a map, right? What’s it going to take to get away from that stuff, to unite, to work together to want to be together to love each other? And I’m curious what that’s gonna take.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah. Well, so am I. And I guess all we can do is practice what you talk about in your book and practice loving and, and we’ll see what happens in the future. If someone wants to know more about you, or and find out about how to get your book and things like that, what’s the best way for people to get ahold of you?

Kim Sorrelle
Well, I do have a website, Kim Sorrelle. My last name, has way too many letters. But I’m the only Kim Sorrelle in the world spelt this way with two R’s, two E’s two L’s. And so kimsorrelle.com is my website. Kim at Kim Sorrelle dot com is my email address. So I’m easy to find on Facebook, on Instagram, anywhere, I love to connect with anybody anytime. I’m I’m very open. And I’m not pretentious. So I love it when people reach out and and I will reach back.

Gloria Grace Rand
Awesome. You know, I’m gonna ask you one more question. What has been your favorite part of this journey that you’ve been on, including not only discovering the true meaning of love, but also even writing the book? What’s been your favorite part?

Kim Sorrelle
My favorite part has been the reaction that I’ve gotten from people who have read the book already, you know, the people that I would send the manuscript out to, and and that’s just been fun and amazing. When people say that all Gosh, this part in the book, this really changed my life, or this really touched me or this really meant something to me. I love that. I want people to get something out of it. And so it’s I love that.

Gloria Grace Rand
That’s awesome. Well, I wish you much success with the book. And again, if you want to be able to connect with Kim, you can go to Kim sorrelle dot com and I will also have that in the show notes of the podcast as well. So thank you so much for being with us. Today, I really appreciate you sharing your story. And like I say, I wish you much success and keep, I was gonna say fighting the good fight. But no, how about keep loving loving one another and spreading your message of love. It’s been amazing the automatic expressions that come to us that are diametrically opposed to the message we want to have out.

Kim Sorrelle
It’s so true. That’s so true. And I so appreciate you, and everything that you do, and the love that you spread, and much more than love that you spread. And so thank you for what you do. And thank you so much for this opportunity.

Gloria Grace Rand
My pleasure, my pleasure. And I want to thank all of you for watching those of you watching live on Facebook today, and I appreciate the hearts as well. And I want to thank those of you who are subscribed to the podcast, and I really appreciate you whether you’re watching it on YouTube or listening to it on Spotify, or goodpods wherever. And I really appreciate you I just want you to know that so. And point I just lost I was gonna say well, I’m just going to say is that until next time, that’s what I’m going to say. And until we meet again, I encourage you as always to go out today and every day and live fully. love deeply and engage authentically

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About the Author
Known as The Insightful Copywriter, Gloria Grace Rand is also an inspirational speaker, author and host of the Live. Love. Engage. podcast. Prior to launching her SEO Copywriting business in 2009, Gloria spent nearly two decades in television, most notably as writer and producer for the award-winning PBS financial news program, “Nightly Business Report.”

Gloria turned to writing as a way to communicate, since growing up with an alcoholic father and abusive mother taught her that it was safer to be seen and not heard. But not speaking her truth caused Gloria problems such as overeating, control issues, and an inability to fully trust people. After investing in coaching & personal development programs, and studying spiritual books like “A Course in Miracles,” Gloria healed her emotional wounds. Today, she helps entrepreneurs develop clarity, confidence and connection to the truth of who you are, so you can create a business that has more impact, influence and income!

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