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The Cost of Suffering in Silence with Eileen Forrestal

In this episode, (recorded live on Facebook), Eileen Forrestal join us from her home in Ireland. She is a speaker, coach, mentor and author of the book, “The Courage to Shine.” Eileen spent many years ‘silenced’ by a speech impediment before she realized her words made a difference, and she needed to stop hiding and start shining.

On this episode of the Live. Love. Engage. Podcast:

  • Eileen shares why self-expression is so important for us as human beings
  • What is the cost of suffering in silence
  • Why listening is a powerful gift to give others
  • What Eileen wishes she’d known before writing her book

Connect with Eileen

Website: www.eileenforrestal.com
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-eileen-forrestal-23a43917/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/eforrestal
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ShineUpYourLife

TRANSCRIPT

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Live. Love. Engage. Podcast: Inspiration | Spiritual Awakening | Happiness | Success | Life

TRANSCRIPT

Gloria Grace Rand
Namaste and welcome to a special live edition of live love engage, and I am delighted to be with you. I am of course, Gloria Grace Rand and I have got a special guest waiting in the wings. So I’m going to be bringing in today and she is coming to us all the way from Ireland. So I want to welcome Eileen Forestall to live love engage. Welcome, Eileen.

Eileen Forrestal
Well, hello, Gloria. Thank you. I’m delighted to be here.

Gloria Grace Rand
I’m delighted to have you here. Eileen is a retired anesthesiologist. And but now she has become well, I found that actually shortly before she she left her job she was she founded a company called Get up and go publications. And that produces the world’s best love inspirational diary. And she’s also the author of her own book called The Courage to Shine. And as well as being a sought after speaker, coach and mentor. And I guess the reason why I wanted Eileen on the show today is because she’s got a big mission. And that is to heal the suffering in the world through words that make a difference, whether that’s spoken words, or written words, and really to be able to inspire and empower all of us to be able to, you know, be our best selves. So, I thought we would start with you sharing a little bit about your journey of, you know, how you how you came to be able to have this big mission of yours to be able to where you want to be able to help people to really heal heal their suffering through words, huh?

Eileen Forrestal
Yeah, well, I suppose, you know, being a medical person, it was probably always in me somewhere, you know, to, to kind of make people better, you know, make the world better. You know, it’s just, it’s like, it’s just part of really what I was always doing. So in my medical career, it was like, making people better, you know, how do you make people better? And then I had, you know, so I trained in all the different specialties, I did a little bit of everything, but I finally kind of specialized in anesthesia. And that was like, really making people better, you could relieve their pain, epidurals, you know, you could, you know, release anything for you know, whether we’re having surgery. So I suppose it was the epitome, really, of the relief of suffering. And, and so that was really my career, you know, I like, you know, 30 years. And, you know, when you’re doing that, you kind of realize what, like, I’m one person, one like, small person, and it’s one person at a time that’s kind of in front of me, you know, and I was always a reader. And probably in the back of my mind, always some sort of writer, but reading and I will like reading words, you know, words were actually really, really important words, good. You know, it’s like good light you off, but words could kind of bring you down.

So I got into and I was like, really busy. I used to buy a little diary, myself was called the Irish survivors diary. And it just had a word city. Or that you could read every day that just like pop you up a little bit, you know? So just kind of used this little diary myself. And it was, you know, it was like my gold shoes, pick me up for a little bit. And I was doing some fundraising at one point. And I was thinking, I wonder if the person who created this diary would give me some of the proceeds of their Christmas day for my fundraisings. So I went to the shop to where I actually bought the diary and where this diary actually come from. And he said, actually, this was a person, she’s a South African lady, and she actually lived about five miles away, which is pretty miraculous. I’m here with the northwest of Ireland and Sluggo, you know, so anyway, I kind of you know, I went round, cornered her door, and I said, Oh, by the way, you know, proposition to her. And she said, she was thinking of not doing it anymore. I thought, Oh, you have to, like depend. This is my money to go to pick me up. And she said, Well, you know, kind of, she just kind of, she wasn’t really able to kind of make a kind of a goal of the business or whatever. So, she offered me you know, what I want to kind of, you know, join her. I thought, Okay, sounds like an idea. Yeah, anything to like not have it disappear something, whatever I had to do? Sure, let’s do it. And so we kind of we changed at the time, it was 2006, you know, and we had this thing in Ireland called the Celtic Tiger, you know, the economy was roaring, it was nobody really like surviving sort of out there. So we thought we were kind of a business thing, maybe we could change the name. I couldn’t be like, you know, like a get up and go diary. So it was just more uplifting and inspiring and really encouraging.

So just a name anyway, so in 2007, was brought up the first Irish guy. And then really over the course of the next few years, you know, we just kept kind of, you know, I just have another idea for about one per day for young people, or the one for Busy Women, because I’m really, really busy. And, you know, we’re just kind of out of things, and then putting people’s stories together for like, a year or two, because what about a scholarly journal, and so we just kind of kept adding and adding, so we have quite a lot of projects. And in 2014, I sort of decided, well, actually, you know, I’m having like, way more fun with books of the diaries and the words, that I was really with the it was just, it was still a very stressful career, you know, and maybe I thought, maybe I could make more impact with words. There. I could just with my one pair of hands. So I just kind of thought, what, okay, I’ll give that a go. So I retired early from the health services, I think my career really loved it, you know, but I just thought, Okay, well, let’s see how I do with this. So here we are.

Gloria Grace Rand
Very cool. Well, tell us a little bit about the book that you were How did how did that come about? Because I knew that has something to do with your own personal story, which again, has to do with the power of words. So tell us a little bit about that.

Eileen Forrestal
Yeah. Okay. Well, I suppose, you know, everybody has got some kind of, you know, a reason or purpose as to why they’re living the life that they’re living, or how they ended up where they end up, you know, so like, I just, I just, you know, I used to share this, like, with people and this, you should write a book about that, really what people really wanted. But anyway, I kind of said, okay, sure, maybe I will. So really, you know, what it was, is that I actually didn’t speak very much at all for like, a huge portion of my life. Because when I was young, and I was a bit, three years of age, or three and a half, I actually had an accident, the overdose of aspirin. And I just developed a stammer. And when I was learning how to speak, I just couldn’t get any my words. So, you know, it was just this, it just became like, just such a struggle just to get the words, you know, when I had like, speech therapists and chose psychologists and all that sort of thing, and I just could not get it. Like, I had so many words in my own head, and it just wasn’t about my message. And, you know, after just what it felt like, just, you know, just being just like, am I ever going to get this right. And then when I was 13, I was in secondary school.

And, you know, I had a really kind of an embarrassing occasion in school, you know, with the teacher, I couldn’t even just say my name, and I just said at the point that that’s it, I’m just, I’m exhausted, I can’t do this anymore. They’re not gonna come out, right? Ever. Stop. Stop talking. I didn’t stop talking entirely, but I did not anything that sounded like there was a, you know, a kind of a, like, any kind of pressure on me to speak or any opportunity to kind of speak with like, for more than one person. You know, the panic would come, you know, the anxiety, it’s like, whatever, am I just the only way to deal with that? It’s just not put myself in that position. I don’t want okay, there’s a good class. So that was my plan. So anyway, you know, so I was quite smart. You know, I could work through anything, I could work through anything on paper, you know, I could pass tests like, no bother. You just couldn’t get out my mouth. Right. So anyway, it was okay. While you were in school, you know, the teachers kind of had a fair idea, okay, leave her alone. She’s doing okay. And I’m like, you leave me alone? I’m doing okay. And then, you know, so you get great results in your exams?

And then you kind of think, well, you know, how am I going to do now? Like, I couldn’t use a telephone I couldn’t, I couldn’t, it’s like, how am I gonna do? And then, you know, somebody had said, my brother actually said, Oh, college is really great. You know, go to college, you know, nobody asks you anything, you just take your lectures, you don’t do your exams at the end of the year in college, what’s the longest course? And then oh, medicine, okay, I can do that. That’d be good. You know, do medicine. And by the time I’m qualified, I’ll have sorted myself out. So in a way, I had actually sorted myself out, but really, I still wasn’t going to speak. I was going to do it, it was going to be one at a time, one on one, but I wasn’t going to actually do it. That was going to put any kind of pressure on me. So that was kind of what I did. And it was like so like, not me, you know, it was like, it was always I was always forced into stay stuff, like, bursting with ideas or bursting with opinions and whatever. I just wasn’t sharing them, you know, caught up in my head. And then I was getting kind of frustrated. You know, when I was looking at other people, I was jealous of other people and how could they do it and they could get worked out so easily and then they talk nonsense.

So So anyway, I think I kind of got over that really, you know, about maybe 20 years ago. You know, I just kind of because I realized what, you know, I was kind of that I was at a seminar and somebody said, Eileen, what are you doing? Well, I’m managing. I don’t have to talk. And I said, No, it wasn’t like, much more fun if you did. So it’s a lot more so it was like it was really now there’s a little bit more probably to it that I kind of surgeons will, because it was a lot of kind of anger as well, about my, with my mother, you know, it was almost like it was her fault that I couldn’t speak. But it was horrible thought if she left at the tablets. And I had all of that. And then all the time, she’s trying to say speak properly. I’m thinking I can’t leave me alone. I can’t do. And it was like, so really, kind of when I kind of had to kind of, you know, question all that and say, Was that really the truth? Like really, you know, was I really did paint her she was great mother. You know, so you had to kind of go back and look at I you know, could I just not be maybe that upset six year old that you know, broke the doll? Could I just know be like, you know, a grown up and sort of say, Look, I’m really sorry. I’m sorry. Madam. Nature. Fun anyway. Problems like this.

Gloria Grace Rand
Well, yes. And you’re certainly talking now. Which, which is great. But But how did you manage to? I mean, I’m trying to wrap my head that, see, I can’t even talk now. Okay, wrap my head around this. So your your stammering but then. So you decided not to talk? But somehow along the way? Is it something that then when you did start to talk a little bit more? Were you able to sort of, kind of get out of it? Or did you actually or did you have some more help with, you know, therapists or someone helping you?

Eileen Forrestal
No, I didn’t actually have any more help it just when actually I was relaxed. The words just came out. It was tension and the anxiety and everything that actually stopped them coming out. So when I could just like like, you know, it just took me just took it to the process. And then really what I was saying, wasn’t like, it was almost like when I was having to speak before you were having to get something right. There was some answer you had to give. That was the right answer. There has to be it was always like in some sort of academic setting, or something that was like the whole context of where I had actually got myself really in a stranglehold. Whereas when it came to just saying, you know, Hello, how are you? It was like, Well, that was easy, you know, so I wasn’t actually then in a position I didn’t, I didn’t actually I was I didn’t have to be delivering presentations. I didn’t have to be doing all the things that caused all the stress. I could just say things like, Oh, hello, sorry. And then I realized that those words just came out. That was easy.

Gloria Grace Rand
That’s awesome. Well, yeah. And I guess what happens is, is that I would think that also then gave you confidence, because you’re like, Okay, well, yes, I can actually Converse when I want to, so I’m not having

Eileen Forrestal
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was all about that. It was just the doing it was just actually risking it and doing it because I just hadn’t wasted four years. I had refused. But then when I said what, okay, I’ll give it a go. Okay. A lot of catching up to do.

Gloria Grace Rand
Absolutely. I want to ask you, why is it that self expression is so important for us as human beings?

Eileen Forrestal
Just is, it just is, you know, like, it’s, it’s in the Bible, you know, self expression is essential to life, if you’re not expressing yourself, who are you expressing? You know, it’s like, this is us. This is it, we’re kind of delivered into the worlds like, This is it? This is us. And then we have to figure out like, who you know, who we are what we are. And then it’s almost like, if you’re looking out all the time to well, am I like that person? Or am I like that person? Or am I not like that person? Or am I not like that person, and you’re upstairs comparing all the time. And actually, I’m just this person has the confidence just to be this person. This person maybe doesn’t get it right all the time. I think this person doesn’t even know what they’re, you know what it is half the time, but he’s like, okay, just to see that, and then to, you know, and then kind of get connected with what really kind of what he loves to do, like what really kind of likes you. You know, and for me, actually, it’s clear, cuz obviously, you know, communication and speaking actually lights me up, right. So when I wasn’t doing that, I was like a very angry person.

And I was very, I didn’t kind of realize that that was so important. And I see people they’re artists, and they’re musicians and they’re lit up and the nice Do people who are suppressed artists and suppressed musicians because somebody said, You’ll never make a living out of that, you know, you’ll never get an income out of that? Or do you want other people to all have to do something that’s going to make me money. And like, yes, if you can make money out of your, you know, your passion, that’s great. But you can still be passionate about what you’re doing, you can still, you know, you can still express yourself in whatever way it is that you want to express yourself, and do what you have to do at work. I mean, I was, even though I wasn’t speaking much at work as a doctor, I still, I was listening to people, I was still trying to make them better. And, you know, there was still that level of accomplishment. But it was just for me, for my own thing was like, oh, no, no. So there is something about humans, we do have this voice, we have this capacity to saying or make noise, or laugh or whatever, I’m not quite allows that. So that’s kind of our self expression. And if we don’t do that, we’re kind of suppressing it, and then we’re repressing it and then we’re depressing. And, and then you wonder what happens in life, we get depressed, and we go into this, the the tunnels in our head, no, let it out of your mouth, or out a paintbrush, or a pen, or something, or dance it out or kick it out or swim. Like let the body let it out. Even if the, you know, the doesn’t come out your mouth. Like I mean, that’s one thing I did do, you know, even though I didn’t really speak very much, which was I did all sorts of like crazy things. You know, I didn’t jump out of airplanes, I control buildings, you know, it’s like, anything I could do physically. I was doing like, I thought it was really brave. I was brave enough to do everything, except speak. So anyway, now I do everything.

Gloria Grace Rand
Well, that’s awesome. And, and that’s something I, I don’t really have any desire to jump out of an airplane, that scares me too much. I’ll find other ways to to be able to step out of my comfort zone. And I wanted to talk because it’s clearly you know, self expression is is important, and we do love, we need to be able to express ourselves in some way. And then when we don’t have what is the cost of it? Because you’re, you know, you basically, you know, decided that, okay, you made a decision, you weren’t going to, you know, talk much because of, you know, realizing that it was causing you stress in certain circumstances, how did that affect you, too, that have a negative effect on you, either personally or professionally? And, and what in general, would you say is, you know, the cost of suffering and silence refurbs?

Eileen Forrestal
When Yeah, because, you know, like, I thought the word suffering is a little bit hard, I’m not quite sure, you know, that we really get the, you know, how present suffering is, you know, it’s a kind of a big word. But, you know, it’s like, when we’re not being fully, you know, you haven’t engaged in life, you know, loving your life, on some level, there’s something where it’s not full, and that is kind of that now you can call it suffering, but we don’t really see it as suffering, but it kind of is, in a way. So it’s, it’s to, it’s to, you know, like some people, some people, you know, when you say it’s a silence, it’s, maybe they’re not saying the truth, you know, and then you’re suffering in a way because you’re not telling the truth about something. So there’s a, it’s like, we know ourselves, you know, you know, the truth, like, sets you free. So, when you’re not telling the truth about something, or you’re not being able to share something, you have to keep a secret or something that causes some, you know, anxiety and tension, which then can, you know, we experienced as a sort of a suffering because it’s the the absence of suffering, we’re very clear about what it looks like, when you’re not suffering when you’re out there playing and it’s whatever, right? And then it’s kind of, you know, we’re all, you know, I’ve grown up a Catholic, it’s almost like you were doomed to suffer on this life. You know, like, that was part of it. I don’t think I don’t think that’s what he meant. I don’t think God meant that. We’re supposed to, you know, love your neighbor. And really, you know, it’s, we’re not really supposed to be suffering, I guess that, that our we’re supposed to be we’re okay. And heaven is the next Heaven is where you’re going to be happy. Like, no, no, we can be happy here. We just have to get the hang of it. You know, and it’s and I think a lot of it is really being okay, and being open. And being you know, having that courage to say things. I think when we’re children, we’re afraid to say things because we don’t want to get into trouble and you know, somebody has said something and you think, Oh, I better not say that. I better not tell about that. I better not tell them that I broke it, you know, and then you sit there with this guilt because you know, you broke it and you can’t tell anybody you know, and then there’s maybe confession, I was double whammy. I couldn’t even tell in confession that I had . And I mean, I was tortured. I couldn’t have any sense. I think if you haven’t, but our sins were when you were seven, you know, it was like… so all of that stuff builds up. So when we can just you know let that go, you know, I was seven or I was five or whatever, and then just take it on the chin. And as adults, we should really should be able to say, You know what I did that. I did it. Mea culpa. Yeah, I did it. I didn’t mean to do it. I did it. And, you know, let’s clean it up.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah. But it is hard sometimes, though, because I know, for me, I, I didn’t have a problem with stuttering. But I know for me growing up, I, my household was a little volatile at time. So you know, my dad was an alcoholic, my mom would, you know, she had a quick temper. And because she was dealing, you know, being in that type of a marriage was not fun for her. And so there was a lot of tension. And so I decided to be silent and not speak so much, because I figured it would be safer that way. So that, you know, then maybe nobody would find any fault with me if I was just quiet. And I also really kind of modeled my dad, because when he wasn’t drinking, he also was just a very quiet person, he didn’t talk much because my mom could carry on conversation, you know, entirely, wouldn’t have to do that. But it, it did cause me some issues, because then I wasn’t as confident in myself in being able to then speak later as, as an adult, that took me a while to be able to kind of get over that and to, you know, really start speaking my truth. And frankly, I think actually doing videos has really helped me. Because I realized that oh, yeah, I do like to talk I just have gotten into the habit of not talking. Did you ever find that that it was more, even when you decided to not talk so much that really just became more of a habit of not talking?

Eileen Forrestal
Oh absolutely. You know, and you get a lot of advantages. Listen, you hear a lot.

Gloria Grace Rand
Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that, too. Cuz cuz I know you talk about a little bit about the benefits of listening. So So talk a little bit about how does that fit in here? And that, because you call listening a gift, actually.

Eileen Forrestal
Yeah, yeah. Well, I think listening is a skill, you know, that really, we’re not? You know, we’re often listening, kind of weary, you know, we’re not really listening from like, really being curious. You know, so when we’re young, we’re given Oh, she said her first word or five words, you know, this, and, you know, you’re in school to get the right answer, like, all the speaking is what gets the kudos. But the listening skills, like really being able to, you know, listen and hear what another person is saying, and learn to sort of sit back and take that time to that the other person gets hurt. So, you know, I would have really listened a lot, you know, I’m really, really listening. I mean, I be listening to you want to see how come the words came out, but I’m also listening to the words that came out. And then how did they match up with what how somebody you what we’re saying, and what they were, how they were actually, sometimes a bit of a disconnect. So I think, you know, if you’re really listening and willing to listen, you can learn so much about people, and then people just get heard. And then they get understood. And then things move on, kind of easier. Because most of it is like, Oh, you don’t understand you’re not listening, you’re not listening to me, you don’t get where you know, all of that stuff. And so I think we there’s a, there’s a, there’s a little bit of a way to go with us in listening. Now, I did read something recently, and it was actually said listening is a radical act. Like because if you listen, you might have to change your point of view. You know, and really, if you change your point of view, what it’s like, where does that leave you? So sometimes it’s easier to hold on to your point of view and not listen to those people over there because they don’t know what they’re talking about blood brain cloud, whatever, wherever it is, then you miss really what people are saying over there. You know, because those people over there, you’re one of those people over there as far as they’re concerned. So you know, we do actually have to get well you know, I’m over here. You’re over there. But if I can hear you what you’re saying then maybe you can hear what I’m saying. Yeah, but there has to be it’s a space it’s a space where listening happens and it’s it’s it’s not really we don’t have a lot of it there’s a lot of noise as there is noise on social media and it’s no it’s everywhere like even when you’re writing a book or you’re talking to a video it’s all so we the gift is that somebody is listening to this It’s all very well and talk, but there’s nobody listening Gloria, we’re just talking into… hot air

Gloria Grace Rand
Like no at least one person is listening right now cuz I can see them.

Eileen Forrestal
like it is a gift, you know, we can’t take it for granted that anybody is listening and, and at the listening, you know, because they’re interested or the listening? Like for whatever, you know, you’ve really no idea we no idea how people how people listen. So it takes courage to speak because there’s gonna be a whole pile of people don’t like what you’re saying anyway. And then there might be one or two that do like what you’re saying.

Gloria Grace Rand
That’s right. Yeah.

Eileen Forrestal
You don’t know, what do you say?

Gloria Grace Rand
Absolutely. And I know part of what happens, I think where there is this miscommunication at times is that rather than listening to the other person, too often, we are just thinking about how we’re going to respond. And like, what are we going to say, to this person. So if we’re not totally present for that person and listening, then then we’re going to miss what they’re they’re saying, and we’re going to even have an idea of how we want to respond. It may totally be wrong, because we haven’t listened to the person. And I know I’ve, I’ve had to improve my listening skills in doing a podcast because I’m interviewing people. And I want to listen to what you have to say. And that, you know, yes, I have, I have a list of questions. But I don’t always go by those questions, because I want to listen to my guest and see what they say. And then have the be able to trust my intuition to respond in a different way, and maybe ask a different question. But if I’m sticking to the script, then I might miss out on something valuable.

Eileen Forrestal
Yeah. So I think that’s the I think that’s the key, you know, and sometimes it takes a while for people to say what it is that maybe they want to see, you know, I think we’re so quick, like, say it fast. And if you can’t get it out, just take some time. You know, I think one of the one of the really interesting questions, if somebody is speaking, is to say, Well, is there anything else you want to say about that?

Gloria Grace Rand
Absolutely, yeah.

Eileen Forrestal
And then it’s like, oh, maybe there was something else I want to say about that, and then somebody is actually asking me, Is there something else I want to say? And then even opportunity, then, because otherwise, it looks like oh, they’re just waiting to get their point in. So yeah.

Gloria Grace Rand
To be, to be able to speak their mind, and that’s a wonderful thing to do for people to do that. What in let’s I want to go back a little bit to you know, you’re starting your business and, and even even getting involved in writing your own book, is there something that you wish you had known when you decided to either, you know, embark on this, you know, you know, taking taking this diary from this other woman, you know, and being able to, you know, create a business from it, since she wasn’t able to do that. And, and even in writing your own book, is there anything that you wish you’d known, when you started out?

Eileen Forrestal
I suppose how, how much it would take in the book, to turn it into something that a reader would get value from, it was like that took, if I had known, you know, then I kind of I suppose I might have written might have, might have taken me as long to write. If I had known earlier such that was, you know, how to turn it round so that the somebody reading, it can actually get some value, because it’s all very well, saying stuff. But person, as I say, reading or listening is like how, how to make it either worthwhile or valuable read for somebody else. So that was that was one. And really, I’m not a great, you know, I really have to say, I’m full of quotes, you know, it’s all quotes. That’s really what the diaries are. They’re full and full of quotes, and I believe them all. So, you know, I don’t really have a thing like, you know, having regrets, or I wish I didn’t think differently. No, it’s taken everything. It took absolutely everything the good, bad, and the ugly to get me right here. And I’m really happy, right. So whatever took, that’s what it took. So if I had done anything different anywhere, I would probably be somewhere else. That’s true. The fact that I’m here, it’s like, no, it’s all good. So I don’t really and the thing is I didn’t we know myself agenda. We did stay in the business. She wasn’t a business for she only retired or she only retired her business in 2016. So we were co partners in the business for quite a few years. So, you know, we kind of got together we could we could actually we collaborated we could actually work together. So that was really good. So yeah, that was just, yeah, it’s about it’s just, I think it’s really maybe if I had I think if I had if I maybe had learned if I had kind of had the courage earlier, probably to, to maybe trust my my, you know, trust my voice and speak and, you know, maybe, maybe my marriage. I don’t know. You know, it’s like when you get to the point you say how did this happen to me and then you realize what actually when you look back at it, it was kind of fairly obvious that if I’m not self expressed within who’s in the marriage anyway, Like this somebody else there. So that was kind of something that I discovered, it’s like, well, so you have to kind of accept yourself warts and all, and, but make the best of yourself. And then when you make the best of yourself in any, whether you’re in a business relationship or any relationships, you bring your best, and then take it from there.

Gloria Grace Rand
Well, I’m glad you learned the lesson. So that’s important. Is there anything else that you would like to share about, you know, listening about self expression that you’d like to share with our listeners and viewers out there that we haven’t touched on yet.

Eileen Forrestal
Maybe just really, to reiterate the same point, it does take courage, it does take courage, you know, it’s not going to, you know, you have to let it out of your own mouth, you’ve got to set you’ve got it to be expressed yourself, you know, waiting for somebody to kind of drag it out of you. It’s funny what I was doing, for somebody, maybe a dragon, it was me that I’m going to do, right, or somebody, we need to encourage you. But if somebody is really encouraging you, I could resist that as well. So it’s really to allow yourself to be encouraged. And because I mean, Courage doesn’t necessarily come like from inside it does from inside, but somebody has to encourage us. I mean, the encouragers in life are like our best, our best gifts, people who encouraged us. So we haven’t always got that courage ourselves. But there are people who are, you know, who care about us and who love us and who wanted the best for us. And they’re trying to encourage us and then work and if we could just say, okay, okay, I trust you, you know, trust comes as well takes courage to trust takes a lot of courage just to live. Say we’re very comfortable in kind of not stepping outside of comfort zones, but they’re say most of the, you know, what we’re like, we’re here in life, like growing, as I say, growing old is kind of predictable, I think, isn’t it, but growing up is kind of optional. And it just takes that courage to like, step up and step out and say, Well, what if and, you know, maybe I could and just to take those risks? And just kind of just say that be courageous? And let the encouragers encourage you?

Gloria Grace Rand
Absolutely. Yeah, that’s, that’s for sure. And, and it can be, if you don’t have support with family, it could be, you know, investing in a coach, it could be actually, you know, talking to a minister or something, you know, whatever it is, but find someone are a really good friend, find someone to be able to be that sounding board for you. I think that’s so important to have.

Eileen Forrestal
That’s very important. Yeah, yeah. Otherwise, you spend a lot of time thinking and worrying. And everything in here doesn’t come out of your mouth. Nobody can hear it, and then be able to kind of, you know, turn it say, you know, and is that true? That’s often the question. No, when you say something, someone will say, is that really true? Like, really? And then you might say, maybe, maybe not.

Gloria Grace Rand
Because we often have blinders on about things or or we’re, we’re in our own little world, and we don’t necessarily see other avenues that could be available to us. And that’s we’re having the benefit of having someone else. Listen to us and listen to what we say that they can then say, Okay, this is what I heard you say? Is that right? Is that really what you’re meant?

Eileen Forrestal
Oh, yeah. Or is that really what you believe? You know?

Gloria Grace Rand
Yes, exactly.

Eileen Forrestal
What happened? How come you believe that when nobody else does? You know, about yourself? You know, I’m not this, whatever they seem to think you are? How come? You’re so determined that you’re not? It’s like, I don’t know. So yeah, sorry. Yeah.

Gloria Grace Rand
Cool. Well, I, this has been a delight, I’m so glad you were able to be up late because I know it’s time differences a little late there. So I appreciate you being with us today. If someone listening to you. Talking today would like to learn more about you and maybe even get a copy of your book. Where’s the best place for people to be able to connect with you

Eileen Forrestal
They can connect on my website, I’m actually pretty available. I kind of I’m on social media, I’m on Facebook and Twitter, LinkedIn. No holds barred. And the book is on Amazon. So you know, you can get it on Kindle or on Amazon. It’s just the courage to shine, it’s Find Your Voice and discovered the healing power of your words. So our words have healing power, you know, the fact that we throw out the other ones. So kind of, you know, daggers or is we could actually let the other ones out. You know, the forgiving ones and loving ones and the kind ones and all those words these days. They do work wonders. Absolutely work at the bedside as well, you know, for medical people, you know, if you just think you know, everything will be fine. And you know, we’ll do this and we’ll do our best, like the awards are very, you know, really we could we could really be a little bit more mindful, I suppose, of the words that we use.

Gloria Grace Rand
Absolutely. Thank you so much for sharing your work. woods with us today. And I’m glad that you are speaking out and speaking your truth and, and writing and all of that. So I appreciate you being with us today. And I appreciate all of you who are watching and listening, who’ve been listening to the podcast now, because this will be uploaded to all the wonderful podcast platform. So I appreciate all of you who, you know, catch us on Spotify and Apple and all those good places. So thanks so much for that. And until next time, I am Gloria Grace Rand encouraging you all to go out and live fully love deeply and engage authentically.

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About the Author
Known as The Insightful Copywriter, Gloria Grace Rand is also an inspirational speaker, author and host of the Live. Love. Engage. podcast. Prior to launching her SEO Copywriting business in 2009, Gloria spent nearly two decades in television, most notably as writer and producer for the award-winning PBS financial news program, “Nightly Business Report.”

Gloria turned to writing as a way to communicate, since growing up with an alcoholic father and abusive mother taught her that it was safer to be seen and not heard. But not speaking her truth caused Gloria problems such as overeating, control issues, and an inability to fully trust people. After investing in coaching & personal development programs, and studying spiritual books like “A Course in Miracles,” Gloria healed her emotional wounds. Today, she helps entrepreneurs develop clarity, confidence and connection to the truth of who you are, so you can create a business that has more impact, influence and income!

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